After you get engaged, you and your partner will probably spend a few days (or even weeks!) celebrating your future with family and friends. But once the excitement settles, it might hit you—it’s time to plan the wedding. While the task can feel overwhelming, it doesn’t have to be. Instead of looking at the whole process at once, focus on small, manageable steps. “Now is the perfect time to find your planner, finalize your guest list, and book your venue and vendors,” says Devon Pearce, a luxury event planner based in Chicago.
Even if you’re eager to dive into planning, take time to enjoy this moment. “There’s a special space between the engagement and planning that deserves attention,” says Mason. “You just made a huge life decision, and more big steps will follow. Whether you take two months or two years, don’t let wedding planning overshadow the process of merging your lives.” Pearce suggests giving yourselves at least two to four weeks to soak in the excitement. “Having meaningful conversations now will set a strong foundation for planning later,” she says. “Don’t rush decisions out of excitement or anxiety. Being intentional from the start will save you stress (and money) down the road.”
Here, Mason and Pearce break down exactly what to do after getting engaged. Keep reading to see how these steps fit into the bigger wedding-planning picture.
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1. Savor the Moment
Make the time right after your “yes” all about the two of you. “Pause and live in the moment,” Mason says. “We often jump straight into planning mode, but don’t let the to-do list take over. Breathe it in and celebrate—just the two of you.”
2. Announce Your Engagement to Your Inner Circle
“Once you’ve soaked it all in, spread the news,” Mason says. Start with those closest to you—parents, siblings, and best friends. If possible, tell them in person. “There’s nothing like getting hugs from your loved ones after such a big decision. You get to bask in the love and show off the ring instead of just sharing it through a screen,” she says. “If you can’t meet in person, FaceTime! Anything beats a text.”
3. Go Public
After personally telling your immediate family and closest friends, sharing a few polished photos on social media is a great way to announce it to a wider circle, Pearce says. “For older relatives or friends, an email with a photo or two is a thoughtful touch. People still love getting beautiful mail, so a printed engagement announcement is a classic choice with lasting appeal.” Plus, mailing announcements can help later with wedding planning. “Sending them early helps you refine your guest list and collect addresses sooner rather than later,” Pearce adds.
4. Insure the Ring
Amid all the excitement, don’t forget this crucial step—get insurance for your new sparkler if you received one. “It’s a small detail that protects a big investment,” Pearce says. “Handling this early ensures you don’t overlook it once wedding planning kicks in.”
5. Envision Your Celebration
Before diving into planning, figure out what kind of wedding you want. “Talk about the experience you want for yourselves and your guests,” Mason says. “What matters most? Should it feel intimate and exclusive or grand and elaborate? Your answers will guide every decision.” Pearce suggests outlining priorities: “Small or big? Local or destination? Any preferred season? What’s your top focus—guest experience, design, or atmosphere? These answers shape your first big choices, like location and venue.”
6. Curate Inspiration
Once you have a general vision, start gathering specific ideas. “Describe your wedding style—colors, textures, formality—and collect images that inspire you,” Pearce says. She recommends using social media: “A shared Pinterest board, Instagram collection, or iPhoto album is perfect for storing ideas to share later with your planner or designer. Look beyond wedding accounts—interiors, food, travel, and fashion can spark inspiration too. A great planner will understand your taste, even if you can’t explain it.”
Mason suggests starting with a conversation. “Think about your favorite furniture at home, your best date, or an unforgettable trip,” she says. “What stood out? The lighting, unique seating, or amazing food? Photos of a couple’s favorite outfits tell me more than saved floral arrangements ever could.”
7. Set a Budget
Time for the not-so-romantic but essential step. “Before planning, know your financial starting point,” Mason says. “Who’s contributing? Is there flexibility, or is the budget firm?” Pearce sees two approaches: Either tally contributions first and set a max budget, or—if you have more flexibility—define priorities first and build a budget with your planner.
8. Draft a Guest List
“Your guest count hugely impacts your overall wedding budget and venue options,” Pearce says. Since the list and budget influence each other, this step and the last may overlap. “Create a working list divided into three categories: must-haves (can’t imagine the day without them), nice-to-haves (would miss them if they weren’t there), and others,” she suggests. “Start with separate lists from each partner and family, then combine them. This helps estimate your VIP numbers and total possible guests.”
9. Hire a Planner
If you want a planner, now’s the time. “Whether full-service or partial, planners bridge the gap between ideas and execution,” Mason says. “They save you time, money, and stress with their expertise in sourcing and negotiating.” Finding the right planner is personal, so take your time. “Narrow it down to two or three, then schedule video calls to discuss your vision and their approach,” Pearce advises. “Your planner becomes a trusted advisor—someone who guides you through logistics and emotions. You should feel comfortable with them, excited by their energy, and confident in their ability to handle your investment.”
10. Tour Venues
Wedding planning is like dominoes—each choice affects the next. “Your venue anchors your date and impacts vendor options, so it’s one of the earliest and biggest decisions,” Pearce says. “Research venues in your preferred location, checking availability, capacity, and pricing.” Since venues are a major expense, Pearce recommends hiring your planner before signing a contract.
11. Set a Date
Booking a venue means locking in your wedding date. Couples who get engaged around the holidays often aim for the following spring or summer. *”We suggest a 12- to 18-month engagement to allow plenty of planning time,”* Pearce says.
12. Celebrate
With the basics set, throw an engagement party! “Ideally, host it at least three months after planning starts (so you can answer questions like ‘where?’ and ‘when?’) but not within three months of the wedding, when you’ll be too busy finalizing details,” Pearce says. Unlike the wedding, which guests plan for far in advance, consider loved ones’ schedules for the engagement party. “Check with key family and friends to ensure they can come,” Mason suggests. “Have a few date options—you might even host multiple parties for different circles to maximize the celebration!”
13. Start Booking Vendors
After securing your venue and date, focus on other details. “Narrow down your top one to three vendors in each category—those who match your style, priorities, and budget,” Pearce says. “This streamlines the process and prevents option overload.”
14. Send Save-the-Dates
This step usually happens at least six months after engagement. Send save-the-dates six to nine months before the wedding—or earlier for destination weddings.
15. Get on the Same Page
Planning can get stressful, so reconnect with your partner often. “Agree to stay united and move at your own pace,” Mason says. “Making decisions under pressure steals your joy, so take the time you need.” Wedding planning is a preview of how you’ll handle life’s big moments together. “Engagement often sparks deeper conversations about the future,” Pearce adds. “Having a clear vision of life after the wedding helps guide your planning. When you’re debating menus, colors, or whether to invite your mom’s college friend, a shared sense of purpose keeps you grounded. Pause now. Reflect on where you’re headed before the journey begins.”
